Thoughts on Yoga
What Comes First, Happiness or Success?
2008-07-18
Dear Friends:
About 20 years ago, I was introduced to the "have, do, be.." equation. This equation stated that most people feel that they must first have something in order to do something in order to be something. Here is a statement that illustrates this equation: "When I have my degree, I will be doing more interesting work, and I will be more fulfilled."
It's hard to argue with such sound logic. It reflects our dominant cultural paradigm of self-fulfillment.
The problem with "have, do and be" is you have to wait until a future time to be the way (or have the feelings) that you wish to have. Your ability to be happy, for instance, will be dependent upon you getting what you want and being successful in your activities. You may or may not ever get there.
Can you be happy if you're not a success in your endeavors? Is your happiness really linked to getting what you want? Have you ever gotten what you wanted, only to be unhappy anyway?
If you bellieve that failure will keep you from happiness, how likely are you to take risks and try new things? But we need risks and new challenges in order to grow and be happy.
Can we pursue happiness purely for its own sake? Does it always have to be the result of some gain or accomplishment?
Let's now look at a less common, but very powerful equation: "Be, do, have." A statement that illustrates this is "When I am feeling gratitude for everything in my life, I am motivated to take positive action, and prosperity continues to flow to me."
There is more personal power in this way of seeing. You don't have to wait for conditions to be right. You put your well-being first and everything you do and have is a reflection of that well-being. Maybe you don't get things you want. Maybe you don't acheive your goals. Your happiness is absolutely not negotiable in any case.
In the end, it's not about simplistic formulas. For me, these three words have helped clarify when to do, when to be, and what I am attracting through my thoughts and actions. I have been able to stop futurizing" my life--thinking that when I finally get it all together, then I will have suffered enough to earn some bliss.
I think yoga operates on a third equation: Do, Be, and Have. We do practices and take actions that generate happiness and well being, which attracts people and resources to us. Yoga is the practical answer to the universal human desire for peace, well-being, and self-knowledge.
Over 20 years on the yoga path has taught me to cultivate the bliss first and let the rest of my day/life fall into line, and not to imagine that any outcome is going to make me happy or unhappy. The only thing that makes a yogi happy is him or herself.
Peace and blessings,
Ruth Anne